"40 Days Without the World"

"I've never seen a person online that's had a bad day online, hair or anything else. And it's damaging." -Christina Norman, former CEO of OWN

When I first started to write this blog, I was going to use the quote "It's been a long time, I shouldna' left you" from I Know You Got Soul by Eric B. & Rakim, and then find a catchy way to say I was wrong. However, with lent being over and my personal social media accounts being reactivated, what Christina Norman said at the WOW conference this March stuck out most. I too have never seen anyone on social media having a bad day. I mean of course why would you post that stuff right? That's a place to show people your best and allow them to bask in your beauty. And that's usually how it happens, even in my last two days back on, I found myself comparing (unconsciously) to lives unknown. Especially with this weight thing because your girl is a whole grow woman now and these new features are scaring me lol! And so, as you may have guessed it, for Lent 2017, I decided to walk away from social media. Throughout those 40 days and nights I went through a few different stages! Each one I'm super grateful for in a funny way, so here goes:

1. I regretted it. Lmbo I know what you're thinking, what girl?! But I did. After just two days in, I thought what in the world did I get myself into? How will I keep up with my friends, news, events, all that good stuff? What will I do with my spare time? Social media has always been my way to disconnect (so I thought) from my own life, truths, and even stress. Every time I get overwhelmed at work the first thing I would do is crack open social media, so now what? By day three I found myself agreeing with a friend about how bored we were without it and that's when I remembered exactly why I gave it up in the first place. I was way too consumed with it. Largely because I was way too focused on the things I seen there. People accomplishing their goals, having babies, getting married, traveling, LIVING. As if I didn't have things to celebrate on my own, better yet things to work on.

2. I traded up. When I gave up social media for lent, I decided I would replace the time I spent on it with two things. First and most important, more time with God. More intentional, intimate time with God. And what better way to do that than read his book? Even better, the Gospels! And so, I did. If you've never read it yourself and you are a believer I'd recommend taking the time to do so. The Bible App even has a plan to help you complete them in 30 days, reading three chapters each day. Reading about God's love for us each day through the teachings of Jesus up until his death and then his resurrection is surreal. It made today (Resurrection Sunday) that much better! Of course, I know the stories, but studying them is something totally different. It's a heart transformation! Every day I wanted more. I read wherever, at work, at home, I even caught myself reading during bible study one night. I've never felt so close to Jesus and it was amazing. It is amazing! Secondly, I decided to give more TLC to my blog. Beyond just writing, I decided to use the one thing I gave up from personal use towards my passion. When I did log on to social media, it was through my blog's pages. And I learned so much! I gained new followers. made new blogging buddies, joined blogging organizations, all that good stuff. I even found a quick little way to make extra cash. (I'll share in this month's newsletter) It was great! It was productive! Before lent I had days where I could sit on social media for hours, it's crazy the things I got done once I gave it up.

3. I transformed. Now don't get ahead of yourself lol, I'm not about to say I'm giving up social media for good! I'll still take pictures and post (within limits, had a change of heart about that too) because I'm just a social person! But in just a month and a couple of weeks, I've changed. I learned to appreciate not being so far into the world, ALL the time. The beauty of that is with my walk in Christ, I know that God is calling me to be different. And once you stop being up in everyone else's business and learn to focus on the Father's business, being different is that much easier. I realized how well the picture of success had been painted to my overly exposed mind because of the access right at my fingertips. That picture was; more education, a higher paying job, nice cars, home, a whole bunch of materialistic stuff. Which is crazy because I always thought that I was good at reminding myself that those things weren't the goal. Yet as soon as I'd see it again I'd fall right back into that trap. Being "out of the world" made me realize that I don't need any of it! As grateful as I am for all that I do have, if it isn't God's will, it can go. If it was yesterday but tomorrow he says different, it can still go! I won't be embarrassed of lacking in front of my peers anymore because it's no longer the world's approval I'm seeking.

When I first decided to participate in lent, I thought this year would be like any other year. I'd give up something, I'd struggle through it and when it's done I'd just say "whew I made it", God clearly had other plans. In this last 40 days, I've experienced a lot, not necessarily anything abnormal but gratefully not anything public. God has a way of covering you like that. I learned to live for me. I found new joys. I may not be perfect but I am different, and I will continue to strive to be. You see the thing about giving my time to God and to this blog is, I realized that this is my praise. This is my service. And because God is so GOOD, it's also my passion! Maybe it's not 40 days you need, maybe just a week. Take a minute just to detox, see if you feel better in the end.

It's not fact or fiction, just my opinion- Kandi