Love, Peace, and Situationships

"I was cool with no commitment, wait let me take that back it was you so I was with it..." - Destiny Child

Love, peace, and Situationships, in 2014 these are the words people live by when it comes to commitment. We also like to throw in "what is understood doesn't have to be explained" from time to time but what exactly does that mean? Clearly you're not justifying your situation for your audience alone, quite frankly it's possible that you're still attempting to convince yourself! So help me understand... Does this mean you don't have to explain your situation to others? Or that your partner doesn't have to explain why they can't commit to you? Or does it mean it may break the peace you've fooled yourself into having without a relationship?

Now don't get me wrong there's nothing wrong with being single. If that life is for you get your swerve on, but don't settle in the process. What do I mean by settling? Don't allow yourself to create relationship habits to please a single (relationship status) man/woman. I'm not saying stop going on dates, or stop attempting to court them. What I'm saying is don't sit on reserve for someone who doesn't really want to be with you. If they wanted to be with you and ONLY you they'd commit to you. Disagree? When is the last time they said "I only want to be with you"? Understand that "I want to be with you", is not the same thing. "I want to be with you" is a statement of interest, not commitment. And until you have that conversation, or make that requirement, that is all it will ever be. Until then it is simply a hall pass to act as a single individual.

Of course all people are different and I won't lie and say I'm not guilty of partaking in this lifestyle because I've done it. I've even missed out on some great people because of it, but if nothing else I'm always learning from it. Sad thing is many people know this lifestyle far too well and they've coached each other into believing it's ok! The convenience of a companionship whenever it's needed but freedom from a relationship whenever it's not wanted, it's a major win for some people! Such a win that they can't imagine life without it. Men are fathering children with women they've never even went on a real date with, women are keeping up households for men that aren't even consistent visitors to. Somewhere down the line we've lost the value in committing to someone. What does that say about relationships? Is it that they no longer exist? As a people do we no longer want the eternal partner God has placed for us? Why so simple?

It doesn't say that you don't love them or they don't love you, it may however misconstrued the fact that one of you may be in love with a person that simply has love for you.

It isn’t fact nor fiction, just my opinion! -Kandi